This Year

I've decided that this year, at some time, I want to be on a sports team. For most people, that doesn't sound like that big of a deal. But outside of gym class, I have never been on a sports team. My parents didn't push me, and I didn't want to do it. I never felt like I was good enough, and I didn't want to be the worst on the team. I was scared to play with kids I didn't know. Once I got to a certain age, it was almost gauranteed that everyone was going to be better than me, because they had been doing it for years. So I decided it wasn't for me.
For some reason, within the last few months, I have decided that this is silly. So this is a goal. I am going to be on a sports team. I don't know what kind of team it will be...but I'm terrified, and looking forward to it at the same time.

I've also decided that before I die, I want to go skydiving. I'm a few years away from that I think...but who knows right?

He Ain't the Leavin Kind

They tried their best to drag him out
of a courthouse down in Montgomery
And now they wanna kick him out of school
And take him off our money
They can take those words off of
Paper and stone
But he ain't gone, no

Chorus:
He ain't the leavin' kind
He'd never walk away
Even from those who don't believe
And wanna leave him behind
He ain't the leavin' kind

She stayed mad at him for a lot of years
For takin' her husband
Started losin' her faith
And thinkin' that her life meant nothin'
But when she looks at those kids she raised all by herself
She knows she had some help, yeah
She knows

Repeat Chorus

No matter what you do
No matter where you go
He's always right there with you

Even from those you don't believe
And wanna leave him behind
He ain't the leavin' kind
No, no

He ain't the leavin' kind
He ain't the leavin' kind
Woo, woo
He ain't the leavin' kind

For some reason, this song makes me get chills. This song makes me sob a little. I can't explain it. The lyrics aren't very poetic, it probably didn't take very much inmagination to write this song, but for some strange reason, I hear this song and I shutter. The feeling that comes over me, is sometimes the only reason I believe that God exists. The longer between times I spend with God, the stronger this feeling is. When I was younger, I told my mom that I didn't know what the Holy Spirit actually did. She asked me if I ever felt the hair stand up on the back of my neck, or goose bumps appear on my arms when hearing a song or a story about God. I told her that I did, and she said, "To me, that's the Holy Spirit." I've decided that I believe this, but maybe my ideas of the Holy Spirit go a little bit further. I believe that God is up in heaven, with Jesus. He chooses to stay up there until the end of time. But the Holy Spirit acts as the intercessor who goes anywhere and who knows all of our needs, hopes, and dreams. It is what communicates with God about our needs. Others will disagree, but this is what makes the most sense to me.

I'm Gonna Let Him Fly

Ain't no talkin to this man
Ain't no pretty other side
Ain't no way to understand the stupid words of pride
It would take an acrobat, and I already tried all that so
I'm gonna let him fly
Things can move at such a pace
The second hand just waved goodbye
You know the light has left his face
But you can't recall just where or why
So there was really nothing to it
I just went and cut right through it
I said I'm gonna let him fly

There's no mercy in a live wire
No rest at all in freedom
Of the choices we are given it's no choice at all
The proof is in the fire
You touch before it moves away
But you must always know how long to stay and when to go

And there ain't no talkin to this man
He's been tryin to tell me so
It took awhile to understand the beauty of just letting go
Cause it would take an acrobat, I already tried all that
I'm gonna let him fly
I'm gonna let him fly
I'm gonna let him fly